Friday, December 29, 2006
Are you like me? or not?
I was listening to them thinking about whether or not I could identify. And I realized that I couldn't. I realized that I don't think anything has ever crossed my "moral" threshold.
Is it because I am immoral?
I think I am a very understanding person, I think that's why I am not easily offended.
And so I started thinking (during that sleepless night - remember that?) what does tick me off? do I have any lines?
I do have one....
integrity.
but even that is flexible.
Take my brother. I know that he changes his mind often, I know that he may not always do what he says he is going to do, I know that in some situation he can be unreliable. Do I say that he has lost integrity? no. because he has integrity in the way that he lives his life. These factors are just things that are a part of him. They ARE his integrity.
I know this is probably confusing. But there you have it. That's just me.
and, if you were wondering...
its tough for me to sympathize with people sometimes because something that is B.U.G.G.I.N.G them can seem to be a non-issue for me.
Its not that I have no ability to be empathetic.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
DONE - for now
I enjoyed putting the kitchen though its paces, and I think we were successful.
Here was the post-Boxing Day cocktail party/open house menu.
cheese coins
crab cakes
mushroom phyllo thingies (also MSL, can't find recipe due to annoying new "search" system)
eggplant dip (also MSL, can't find recipe due to annoying new "search" system)
baked brie-recipe from a friend
orange-yogurt cake (also MSL, can't find recipe due to annoying new "search" system)
brownie bites-from a box
I also put out guacamole from TJ's and See's chocolates.
Jen brought salmon tea sandwiches and an apple pie, and Adrian made baked beans with kielbasa.
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
One thing we didn't fix
The oven is at the short end of the island.
In itself that is not an issue.
But for some reason, people like to stand in that spot. So if you need to open the oven, you have to ask the people to move. And for some reason, people forget that you just asked them to move, so as soon as you close the oven, they are back standing over there.
Now add to this that the oven temperature varies, so you have to keep looking at the thermometer inside... so when you are baking or cooking in my oven, you need to open it a lot!
on the left is the location of the oven in relation to the island; on the right is how much space you have to stand there with the oven open. Since I am fairly small, you can see the issue.
In my sleeplessness of the other night, I was pondering this issue. Mostly, I was wondering why people stand there. If you are paying attention to where you are in space and there are things going on around your back - THAT close to your back - wouldn't you move, and stay moved?
oh.
while I was taking those photos, I realized I could capture the reflection of both skylights in the counter:
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Sleepless Nights
I had all these ideas for things to post on my blog... and then composed them. Complete with spellcheck! I actually contemplated getting up and typing... but thought, well - if I lie here still I might fall asleep - three hours later...
anyway, its morning, I did sleep, and now I'm waiting for a 10:45 vet appointment, and I have to stop Max from peeing before then so that they can do a urine sample and make sure that his "inappropriate elimination" is not due to medical reasons. Yea, we know its behavioral, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt - first.
So, I'm going to do some typing, cleaning, things where I will be still, so they will just lie with me and not want to be outside or wandering.
That's all for now, but stay tuned for some "dailies".
Monday, December 25, 2006
Holiday Season
Usually, we have some sort of gift experience, a lot of family time, and a few social events.
This year, we had LOTS of social obligations before the holidays.
We planned a cocktail party/open house here for all our friends as that one social event.
But all those plans went awry.
We only made it to one pre-Xmas party, and we’re hosting THREE.
I was talking to a friend about getting together on Xmas eve, and decided we’d host a dinner. On Sat, the guest count went from 6 to 8, to 12, to 13, to 10. Luckily, our menu was planned to feed an army, so we are just eating the leftovers for the rest of the week.
Tomorrow I start shopping & cooking for the party, and then or New Year’s Day we do a small gift exchange. Those are all the social events.
In the meantime, I’m using the days to catch-up on errands. Today, we rented a carpet cleaner! and removed the evidence of “kitchen” from the porch “carpet”! How’s that for “spirit?!”
Thursday, December 21, 2006
are your worries really that bad?
if you and everyone else hung your worries on the worry tree, and then you could pick the ones you wanted,
you would select your own.
Monday, December 18, 2006
aHa!
Such a Challenge
Saturday, December 16, 2006
A theory on a new topic - "terrible" twos
When your kid is a baby, not communicating intent, only demanding fulfillment of basic needs, you make all the decisions. You can pick the kid up and move it, you can feed it what you like, you give it something to play with, you are calling all the shots.
Once the kid starts to think, it wants to have more autonomy. Ok, so I know that's the definition of terrible two... kid claiming independance. But usually people put that on the kid... the kid is naughty, the kid has a temper, the kid is demanding, the kid won't do what its told.
My thought, is maybe this is really about the parent. You are stuck in a rut, you are used to a type of behavior, you are not used to letting your kid call the shots. Think about a six year old. You allow the kid autonomy, and you talk to them about things you want them to do. "Please will you put on your shoes" - whereas with the 2YO, YOU try to put on the shoes.
So maybe an idea would be to start reasoning with your kid early on so that when you hit that autonomy age, the kid has the feeling of decision because you are talking to it, rather than just doing.
Perhaps you've already figured this out, and I'm the one who's lagging.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Another Theory about Management
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
My dream Job!
Monday, December 11, 2006
the season
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Friday, December 08, 2006
I'm thinking about it
What is it that I had in my 20s that I don't have now.
I don't think I understood about being a woman when I was in my 20s. I wouldn't say I was a tomboy, but I didn't see any difference between men and woman. I didn't know what it was that made me interesting or appealing as a woman. I do now, but my body is starting to look its age. If you don't know me, that may be a strange statement, but I have always looked very young. In fact, about 6 years ago, someone asked me if I was 18, and 2 years ago, someone asked me if I was 24 (I will be 40 in 2 years), so that's some real young looking. But, I think over the last year, I have started to look my age. This is one of the reasons I got the PT... I want to be in shape when I turn 40. I want to be firm, fit, and energetic. I am REALLY worried about the progression of the metabolism slow-down. I don't want it to upset me as much as it did in my 20s.
I also think that when I was younger I had a confidence with serious blinders, and through time, I've been "hit" by confidence busters. I was definately more carefree in my 20s, more confident, and I think I was "lighter"...
I look at all the young-uns at the gym and I think, I used to be that confident; I wish I could tell them how to hold on to it.
Thursday, December 07, 2006
retrospection
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
December, the month of missing
...but after all was said and done, my mom started having horrific allergy attacks, and the only thing we could figure caused them, was the tree... so out it went.
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Happy Birthday, Mom
She has always been a creative person. Mostly using fabric as her medium. When I was young she was always doing an embroidery or tapestry of some sort, and I remember applique became the rage for a while, combined even with the embroidery. When we moved to America she made the obligatory geometric quilt, that oh so American of handiwork traditions. But my mother is not ordinary, and she is not geometric, so that wasn't going to do. She has been playing with different types of concepts now that all of these fabric and thread art forms have smoldered inside her left brain, and they have emerged from her into an expression of original creativity. She has become making fabric art. Since I think sometimes that I am the guinea pig receipient of the first try, like the first pancake in the batch, I would like to say that it started with a tapestry she made for us and our first home. I don't know that we ever hung that up in that house, but our new house had the perfect spot.
...and then she told me she wanted to try crazy quilts, and wanted to make me pillows, so I said, make them like Sassy toys.
...and then it just evolved into a fabric art craziness!!!
.... and now... someone saw her art at the coffee shop and she's having exhibits all over the place!!
So - in homage to my Mother...
happy birthday, and may the creative force be with you propelling you into retirement from one career, and into another that motivates, releases, and invigorates you.
Getting into the spirit of the season
Saturday, December 02, 2006
Plans for Sat
Friday, December 01, 2006
random thoughts
Thursday, November 30, 2006
n=30 one continuous month
Well, I made it.
I'm kinda proud, actually…
I think that this was actually a very valuable experience, and I'm glad I took on the challenge. I didn't know whether or not I would make it, and I'm sure it was touch and go there for a while, especially yesterday… didn't think I'd make that one at all.
The most valuable things I learned:
Rebecca and I are very much alike.
I should have spent more time chatting with her when we were stuck in a Mexican beach house two years ago!
I can write something interesting if I put my mind to it.
Yahoo has people running bots to make sure no-one out there is unhappy… I'm happy about that one =)
I have visitors!!
Anyway… now that my obligation to post is over, I feel obliged to continue the trend of posting regularly. But, what I will do is continue to take on the challenge of thinking of something interesting. I won't just go on about nothing like I did at the beginning of this exercise. I will continue to take the time to muse on a subject. And if I don't have anything interesting to say, I won't post.
How's that?
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
n=29 ok, the pilot is snoring
There was a man who came on carrying a piece of wood. It look hollow-core like a door. It wouldn’t fit anywhere, and the flight attendant was getting a little annoyed with him. Eventually she took it and checked it. I was wondering if the sticker would stay stuck, or if the baggage people would forget it in the hold, thinking it was meant to be there, or that it couldn’t actually be anything of importance.
Ok – the pilot is snoring.
Today was exhausting. Yesterday I just sat in a meeting and watched, today, I had to talk, listen, and absorb. By noon I was saturated. I don’t think I slept well last night because I was tired all day. Right now, I’m very hungry… and sleepy. I am relieved to find out that my company has some people with serious expertise in the area that I needed, and they have availability to help me on my project. Whew, in a major way!! I really didn’t want to learn how to do all this stuff.
Anyway, I’m going to watch a movie, and pretend I’m somewhere far away.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
n=28 home stretch
I've realized being here that a lot of my musings come during traffic driving, and so when I'm not driving in traffic, I'm not really musing... now airplanes... you can look through my archives for the insightful uplifting things I've written on airplanes... not!
Geez - preview of Happy Feet on HBO... this seems to be pretty much the WHOLE movie with narration! and does it look cheezy.... I was hoping it would be like the Madagascar penguins... but, ah, no, its the Marching movie in English and animation.
I'll see you guys tomorrow due to tiredness of the right now.
Monday, November 27, 2006
n=27 to be friends, or not
Well I just made the trek across the country and I'm in
This flight wasn't so bad. Not as bad as flights can be for me. I watched two movies on my computer. I love my umpc. I have an extended battery now, which got the computer and DVD player and me all the way across the country. Movies are really the only way for me to make flying bearable – when I'm on my own.
I'll be pretty busy the next couple days, so I'm not sure that I will have time to think about topics worthy of musings… but you never know when those little pieces pop into your mind.
For example, flying in today, I thought about all the blogs I read that are from people who live here. Chris at RudeCactus, and Amalah, and I wondered what they were up to. Unlike a TV show, where you might find that you feel you know someone well from watching, these bloggers are real people, they are not characters. But, like Heather at "This Fish Needs a Bicycle" said, I don't actually know them, and for sure they don't know me. So I guess I won't be knocking on any doors. But, it might be fun to meet some of the bloggers I read… so that's my thought for today… I'll think about picking one and we'll see if we can make that happen.
Sunday, November 26, 2006
n=26 ASU
how apropros
"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that
you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines.
Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails.
Explore. Dream. Discover."
--Mark Twain
Saturday, November 25, 2006
n=25 oh, that American holiday of thanks
Friday, November 24, 2006
n=24 finality
Thursday, November 23, 2006
n=23 public or private
So, when I wanted to experiment with Blogger, I used my name. You can tell by my archives that I didn't post for a while, and then when I came back to actually blog, I used this site instead of creating a new one. And now I have my audience of you, and you know who I am.
In my surfing of blogs I have learned that there are people out there who have had very bad experiences when their blogs have become linked to them. And so I have been wondering about my "safety" since mine is so, so, public and so, so connected to me.
Would it be a problem for my employer to read my site? my employees? my collegues? and what if I go looking for another job? How would this site represent me?
I have tried to be honest, and have integrity in how I post. But I do swear, I do post some of my more "radical" opinions, would all of that have an affect*?
so, I've been wondering lately if I should be more careful, switch to a more anonymous site, or let it go.
*if its effect, just keep it to yourself, I've been sitting in my bed for 3 hours screwing around online, I don't feel like thinking about aff's and eff's!!
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
n=21 oh, I love working at an engineering firm
Monday, November 20, 2006
n=20 role models?
fucking kitchens; and patios; and toasters; and everything else that exists
Sunday, November 19, 2006
n=18 yikes!
This whole daily thing is tough!
I wonder, is it better to just post when you have something to say?
or is the goal to try and be insightful everyday?
I guess since my blog is "musings" that can be my topic of musing for the 18th!
Friday, November 17, 2006
n=17 drunk
so we walked to the italian place so we could drink wine, and now I'm home, its late, and I nearly missed 17 which would be REALLY bad considering how much I wanted to be on the listing, and then it would suck if today was the day I BLEW it... but now, I'm musing about drivel!
I was going to take a photo of my car clock so you could see how late I was driving home, but the flash and photos, and dark was bad, so nothing.
Yay! weekend!!!
What are you going to bring o' weekend?!
Alas still an unfinished kitchen, but lo' we rehung some pics so it feels a teensy little bit more like "home".
hey, I know, I'll post ya a photo.... how 'bout in the mornin', though... due to extreme unable to focusness.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
I would never have thought
n=16 argh!
6:30, not here yet, so I call - he's still about 20 mins away!
6:50ish, get on the road to Tucson.
I had not eaten breakfast 'cause I figured we'd stop at strbcks on the way, and now we were about 45 mins late, so no stopping.
8:40 get to meeting
PEE!!!!
sit in meeting until 1pm
I AM STARVING by now.
1pm eat BBQ - in TWO SECONDS!!!!
back to meetings.
4pm - give up. leave.
take circuitious route through Tucson to find a coffee place.
PEE!!
drink a chai and a water, eat madelines - after yesterday, I know I don't need those, but who CARES!
drive through Tucson traffic to get to highway.
6:30 get home.
there are emails I should respond to
there are things I should do
but, for GOOD reason... I feel sick
and I'm tired, so I'm fucking going to veg on the couch and watch TV!!
you in my inbox... you don't mind waiting another day do you???
love ya!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
n=15 personal trainer
This is not the first time that I've met with one, but maybe this is the first time I felt it was real.
The first time was at my old gym, when I joined up they gave me the free sign-up session. Didn't stick. I felt like they were normalizing me like putting me through the sausage factory.... "this.is.the.workout.that.people.do."
A month ago, I thought I'd give it a try at my current gym. I have friends who work with trainers here, and my one friend LOVES her trainer.
So I went to the trainer counter and asked them how it works. A young girl "got" me, I figured I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and saw it through the intro meeting. Again... "this.is.the.workout.that.people.do" but with a different flavor - NOT!
I told my friend who loves her trainer, and woo hoo, she hooked me up. Well that's who I met with today. And, yeah, she's good. She listened to what I said my goals were, and she explained to me what I need to do to get there. I heard her, and I signed up.
But, I have to say, its a little humiliating! Like, "umm, this body you have, you're not really using it right, see here? all these numbers, they say that you don't know what you're doing! ah, yeah, this running program you're putting yourself on? its not gonna work, 'cause, umm, you don't know what you're doing."
now - she did not say these things to me, and she was actually very nice with me, I'm just saying, this is like the deep seeded issue I have with whether or not I can take care of my body.
Anyway, we are on the path to recovery. Soon to be personal trained!! and I'm hoping that I'll look like Jennifer Aniston, no, not her face, her BODY! she's the same age as me, that's why she's my "goal" look.
later, I'm going to eat some FAT!!
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
n=14 high emotion
Do you scream and shout? do you punch and hit? do you hold it in and release it later?
What about a situation that you go into with high emotion but you know you have to keep it under control?
Do you talk softer? does your voice crackle? do you scream and shout?
I cry.
GOD I hate it!
Its not sobbing crying, just tears running down my face.
It looks like weakness, but its just the release of emotion, and when I am angry, that's the physical response. It really does not work. And every time I'm in one of those situations, I think "control it, control it"...
but it never fails.
My physical response wins.
this is just not a good behavior if you want to be considered seriously at work
Monday, November 13, 2006
n=13 on marriage
I am a pretty self-sufficient person. I think I have always been this was - as I hear from my mother. I don't ever remember thinking about being married or in a relationship when I was a child. I used to dream and plan about what I would do when I had my own apartment. I had lots of plans for when I was finally not living at home.
Keep in mind, also, that at the age of 6, I decided that I would move to America, which means that I never had any long term plans for South Africa. All my plans had me living without my family in America.
I have NEVER, EVER, imagined myself in a wedding dress. I have never imagined my perfect wedding day. I have never ever thought about that ONE DAY.
I did, however, imagine the companionship and partnership of sharing my life.
Being such a... I hate all the words that can be used to describe me because at some point in my life they have been used as a negative - even though it is a matter of opinion which way they go, so let's just say: being the way I am, I didn't have a lot of attention from guys in high school. They were chauvanistic men who wanted wives. Maybe that's when I started feeling like I was not going to be a wife.
I remember one time sitting around with a bunch of girls and they were talking about how they didn't see the need to learn to drive because their husbands would drive them everywhere they needed to go! Now, in my mind... driving was my first step in the plan to that little apartment. Nowhere in my plan was there a husband.
moving on - to anthropology.
I think this should be a required subject in college, like science and English. Why? because it teaches you about "other"... it makes you realize that there is not ONE WAY... all over the world there are people living their lives in a social system that they believe is right, and The One. But guess what?! it completely contradicts YOURS!! haha... what are you supposed to do about that?! I love it.
Anyway... matriarchal, multiple wives, multiple husbands, bands, tribes, villages, one god, many, spirits, witchcraft, huts, houses, so much diversity in the world. What did I take from all of this for myself? anything is acceptible, and you can define your life if you want to. That is my freedom. I want to live my life on my terms, not those defined by society. The society that I live in, keep in mind, 'cause they are all different.
which leads you to realizing that marriage is not a necessity. It is not an end, it is not a goal, it is just a convention of THIS society.
I do not want to be someone's "wife". I do not want someone to define themselves as my "husband". I do not want what comes with our culture's perception of that word: marriage
(And the fact that people are all worked up about it with the whole gay marriage thing proves my point - but that's another story).
so here I am... I do not need my relationship with my partner to be defined by the legal proceedings of the state I live in. I do not need to define my relationship with Mr. B for you. I only need to define my relationship for me; and we do that everyday when we interact, make decisions, overcome advesity, look at our home, look at our life, make each other laugh, and on and on.
why, on earth, do I need a piece of paper filed in a courthouse to do that for me?
Let me tell you, though, that this is THE most often asked question... people do not understand my decision.
and when they ask
"why are you not married?"
my answer is now:
"I have not yet heard a good enough reason." and of course, said person goes through their opinion of why we should be married:
kids (if gay couples can adopt, and they can't get married, why can't we?)
expression of love (nice one! I don't love Greg?!)
committment (ha ha... if someone is "committed" to you because of a paper, they are not committed to you... they are required by law to be with you... yip, that's the relationship *I* want)
security (huh?)
etc
Greg and I have been doing this for 13 years. We have papers filed at a lawyer's that give us all those legal rights that marriage gives us... but guess what...
WE WROTE THEM! WE DEFINED THEM!
My friends tell me that they are married because it is something that they wanted. Now, implicit in that statement is the expression that it was something that they needed to do. They do not judge me for not being married, and I do not judge them for being married. They understand that it is not something that I want, just as I understand that it is something they they want.
does that make sense?
Sunday, November 12, 2006
n=12 in response to Rebecca; why I don't have kids
I'll stick to the highlights, so if anyone wants elaboration, let me know.
My mom and my aunt are elementary school teachers, so my childhood was filled with them developing lesson plans and talking about children and how they "work". I don't even know if I can say what it is that I absorbed those years, but I do know that I have an intrinsic understanding of how kids work.
Second, my aunt had kids later in life, and I was 11 when the first was born, so I was the perfect age for childcare slavery. My aunt and I were really close and so she let me do pretty much everything. My cousins were born 2 years apart, so that was some concentrated childrearing experience. And I kinda felt like I had, through those experiences, "done" the childrearing thing. So it has never been an experience that I felt I needed to have.
But the REALLY big deciding factor was that when my aunt was about 6 months pregnant, she and my mom had a conversation about all the things that can go wrong during pregnancy and childbirth. I think I pretty much decided at that point that I was never going to do that to myself (at the age of 11, I actually decided that I was going to get a hysterectomy when I was 18 - how's that for being decisive?) So that seed of a decision was given water and sunlight as I realized other things about pregnancy and childbirth through life - I'm not even going to go through the list.
(I told my aunt all this recently, and it really upset her 'cause she didn't want to be "blamed" for my decision - but you know, there had to be something in me that felt this way for those realizations to attach to)
Next - I am a pretty competitive, ambitious person... and I wanted to make sure that I was confident in my career before I did anthing to compromise it.
I also like new experiences and learning, so the idea of going back and doing something I've already done doesn't ever attract me. If I had never been a part of a new-born becoming a kid, I might want to give it a try, but since I feel that I've had that experience in a major way, its not a place I need to go to.
and Finally - as I've gotten older, and become comfortable with my life, I've learned and realized about the hell that is the life of a foster child, or child up for adoption. And my (I guess its political?) point of view has become that there are so many children out there who have the potential to become something with the right nurturing that its selfish to create another kid when you are a happy couple/life that has stability and love to offer.
JUST PLEASE NOTE: this is my opinion, and in no way does it mean I judge people who give birth!
so those are the big point in the book of "Why Lisa doesn't want to give birth to a baby".
how about you?
(rebecca, you're a sneaky sneak! I thought it was you, but I wasn't 100% sure until you commented at Mr. DRB!! now I realize you're more interested in why I'm not married, 'cause you have 2 great kids, so it can't be the kid thing that you identify with (?)...)
n=11 whew!
I promise I'll do a better post tomorrow.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Conversations with Aaron B Stiner - Shout Out
Friday, November 10, 2006
n=10 A special shout-out
He got me a response to this issue I was having. And not only that, the person has actually offered to make sure to see the resolution through.
and this brings me to an interesting feeling.
obviously, Mr. Kennedy found my issue because I turned up in a search or some other type of tracking thing he does to find Yahoo! mail out there.
and its kinda funny to "meet" someone this way, and its kinda funny to do "business" by posting a whiney moan in my blog and get help on an issue.
but it also kinda feels good.
I guess, this is an official documenting of my official visibility in the blog world
and I guess I like that.
I haven't been trying very hard to make it happen, so I'm surprised, and I like it!!
but enough about me...
THANK YOU Ryan Kennedy!!! thank you VERY much!!!!!!
for finding me, for pinging "M", for helping!!
(see, it doesn't take much to make me happy)
Thursday, November 09, 2006
n=9 Ramblings and offers
Anyway... I am plodding through crap at work. I am very stressed out, and not having a kitchen stresses me out, and money stresses me out, and worrying about all of that crap stresses me out, and working late hours so that I don't get to do my extra-curricular activities pisses me off! and then I feel unfit and like its SO FAR to work back up to where I want to be... and then I feel old, which makes me feel like I LOOK old, and then I get depressed, and stressed, 'cause my life is flying by, and am I really doing what I want to be doing? and am I really spending my time in the way I want? so that I get the most out of every moment? and that answer is a HUGE NO! so that makes me depressed and stressed, and then I look at this aaaaaaaa and wish I lived THERE! but I know that's not easy... 'cause it also includes a lot of this: YIKES!
whine, whine, whine... get your shit together already, Lisa!!
anyway... that's not what I wanted to go on about today...
instead, I thought I would put out there for my "regular" readers...
is there anything you have ever wondered about me?
(you can post an anonymous comment if you don't want to be "recorded")
or is there an opinion of mine you've never heard before (SHOCKER!) that you might like me to go on about?
Since I am trying to post every day in November, I figure I might as well give you something to read that you'd actually WANT to read.....
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
n=8 Fall in AZ and Cars
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Grr... to Yahoo! Mail
I want the new interface back!!
I have sent emails to the Help department EVERY DAY and I still haven't heard what's going on.....
When I try to go in, I get this message "Couldn't open mailbox!"
comeon, that's just mean!!
do any of you use the new Yahoo! Mail? are you kicked out? or is it just me?
Farm 421 needs your help!!!
n=7 Choosing a Path toward Affect *
Monday, November 06, 2006
n=6 serial numbers
Sunday, November 05, 2006
n=5 progression of life: a view from the mall
We ate dinner at the outside bar that looks at the mall entrance so we watched people going in and out and then we walked through the ford court to go into the mall.
I saw a lot of teenagers posturing. There were girls flirting with boys and vice versa. Let’s assume they are not having sex… so there’s all this flirting and playing with the implicit understanding that what they want is sex, partnership, pairing, with the goal of marriage. And what comes with marriage? Kids.
You look at all these teenagers and they are having fun and there’s excitement, electricity, and energy.
Next you have the young couples. They are holding hands, or wrapped up in each other, and all in love. They are the teenagers in the next step or phase. Now they have coupled and there is the sense of relief, and perhaps excitement for the anticipation of what comes next. The potential of the rest of their lives. And what is that? Kids?
Then you have the food court and it is almost all parent(s) with kid(s).
And there is a look of faraway in their eyes. They are absentmindedly feeding the kid. Or they are wrangling the kid, cleaning the kid, trying to distract the kid.
There is a distractedness of longing for simplicity. They are at the mall to get out of the house and this is a safe place to go.
The progression.
Do you get what I’m trying to get at? It was weird seeing all phases in one place. I wanted to say to the teenagers “just look inside. Is this really what you want? Do you realize this is the end gave to your posturing? If you could, would you make different choices?
Saturday, November 04, 2006
n=4 Sat
cutting this one close forgetting in a post a day!
We slept in, went for breakfast (Brunchies), lay on the lawn, shopped for paint(Oatmeal and Tibetan Jasmine), dinner (Kona), mall (Chandler), movie (Borat).
A very relaxing G. birthday for both of us.
I had a thought at the mall. It has to do with the cycle of life as it is represented at the mall. I'll fill you in tomorrow. ;-)
Friday, November 03, 2006
n=3 - Ummm?
Thursday, November 02, 2006
n=2 traffic
I've been accumulating these but always forget to write about them, seems like this is a good opportunity to make conversation.
1. If I am in the travel lane, I have the right of way. Just because you put your turn signal on, does not mean that I give way to you - idiot!
2. If you are not travelling at the speed of traffic, move to the right. Hello! doesn't it say "slower traffic move right". Do you not understand that you have now BECOME the CAUSE of TRAFFIC.
3. Did you not hear that you are now required by law to keep a 2 second space between you and the car in front of you? This means that you should respect MY space. Don't steal it!! If everyone maintained their space, we would all have wiggle room for slowing down, and quite possibly, the stop and go traffic that WASTES GAS AND PRODUCED CO2 would be reduced! And besides, it means that I might be able to avoid putting in my clutch - just this ONCE ! PLEASE ! help me reduce my clutching!
4. If you cannot operate your vehicle, a weapon of mass destruction - for many reasons but particularly because you only have ONE hand (and no handicapped plate and special car) because the other is holding the PHONE to your EAR - safely... GET OFF THE ROAD! You are obliged by LAW to use your turn-signal to COMMUNICATE with ME; so GET OFF THE PHONE and communicate with ME!
Driving is the only time that I am ensconced in the general public; therefore it is the only time that I get a good feel for the intelligence of the general population, and honestly, I am disappointed! and it mostly makes me angry.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
November is for blogging, or n=1
(can someone tell me how to add the banner in my sidebar? I don't know anything about html, or blogger templates. I have the .jpg in flickr, what is the code I add here?)
This means that I might be posting some drivel! So I won't be offended if you leave. I know, I don't have patience for scroll and scrolls of text!
And in keeping with my technical writing strengths, I'm going to number these entries like a count..
So for n=1 you get Halloween.
Halloween 1, SUCKY = taking NINETY minutes to drive the 20 miles home. and I left work at 4 ! Next year, I'm leaving work at ONE! or I might just "work at home" all day.
Halloween 2 = Our house looked pretty cute... we each did a pumpkin and I put one on the mailbox, then I lit luminaries all the way down the drive and walkway. We had the smoking cauldron, giant spider, and rats.
Halloween 3 = there were TONS of kids; I nearly ran out of candy; and I had fun.
Halloween 4 = a friend from work and his 3 kids came over (they live very close) and it was fun to actually have some kid-energy IN the house.
Halloween 5 = about 5 cars of people drove in and canvased the neighborhood. I wouldn't have minded if they had separated out, but they decended in one big clump, and that many people do not fit in our outside "vestibule".
Halloween 6 = I got a call from the Harry Mitchell campaign (Aaron), and I told him to call people who a) hadn't voted yet and b) needed to hear WHY they HAVE TO vote for Harry Mitchell
Halloween 7 = people at work dressed up like the Alice in Wonderland characters. Whatever!
Halloween 8, a Thought = if you are out with your kids GETTING candy, it makes sense for the other parent to be at home GIVING IT OUT. ie you complete the circle. When you don't HAVE kids, and you're giving it out, does that count as good karma? hope so
let's see what I can come up with for n=2... I'm curious, aren't you?
Monday, October 30, 2006
Conversations with Aaron B Stiner - 13000 Sleeps
This is my friend Aaron. He is trying to change the world one conversation at a time. Do you agree? Do you not? Let him know.
"Are you nuts?"
There's a proposition on the AZ ballot that all voting get done by mail-in ballot and that polling places get closed.
ARGUMENTS "AGAINST" PROPOSITION 205
Are you nuts? This is the "Let's Destroy America" proposal.
The nation is supposed to rise up as a whole, and make decisions all at once, on election day, IN PERSON. It's traditional, historic, part of our very fabric. It helps make America great. The body politic acts, live, at the polls. America invented this. It's not delivery work for the Post Office.
Closing polling places for mailed elections makes fraud easy -- did the Post Office deliver your signed ballot? You won't know. Did you even get one in time? Did someone else gets yours... or two? Did you vote early, and now your candidate is... dead? Under investigation? In prison? Imagine the lines with most polls closed.
Voting is a sacred right of liberty. It requires a little effort folks. You have to find out who's running and what the issues are. Then you have to get off your lazy keester, go to a polling place with your neighbors and cast your vote. If that's too much, then you personally are letting precious freedom die. This isn't about the disabled or absentees -- it's about citizenship.
Iraqi people went out to vote, under threat of murder. Americans have given their lives, for centuries, so you could go vote. Honor them. Don't sell out for a lazy, corruptible mail-order substitute.
Next thing you know, they'll offer lotteries to get your vote. Then, people who know nothing and simply want a loser's chance to win money will mail in chances to win. What's that -- someone's already proposing cash giveaways?
Preserve freedom. Defeat the Vote by Mail Act. And get more news authorities hide from you at PageNine.org, or for real freedom issues, check out The Liberty Poll at GunLaws.com.
Alan Korwin, Author
Gun Laws of America
alan@bloomfieldpress.com
Alan Korwin, Author, Gun Laws of America, Scottsdale
Saturday, October 28, 2006
I give in to the meme
this one's funny, I think.
1. Flip to page 18, paragraph 4 - in the book closest to you right now, what does it say?
"When you are older, perhaps."
Tomb of the Golden Bird - Elizabeth Peters
2. If you stretch out your left arm as far as possible, what are you touching?
Cat brush-prickly
3. What's the last program you watched on TV?
It was last week, I guess, I can't remember
Maybe Survivor
4. Without looking, guess what time it is.
9.45am? hum-10am
5. Aside from the computer, what can you hear right now?
Someone drilling and Molly purring
6. When was the last time you were outside and what did you do?
Waited for Greg on the curb at the airport
7. What are you wearing?
Grey T-shirt and light/loose pants
8. Did you dream last night?
probably, but was so tired all I can remember is turning off the light
9. When was the last time you laughed?
Thursday- a couple times, but the best was when this older woman described herself (with pride) to have a "volatile personality". I laughed because I hope to be in that place at her age.
10. What's on the walls, in the room you're in right now?
Framed photos of beach ripples that Greg took and leaning on the walls are the framed prints of Australian aboriginal art from the living nom.
11. Have you seen anything strange lately?
no
12. What do you think about this meme?
interesting, fun to fill out
13. What's the last film you saw?
Family Stone - Blegh.
14. If you became a multimillionaire, what would you do with the money?
Pay off debt. Give to family, give to charity, stop working and adopt children.
15. Tell us something about yourself that most people don't know.
16. If you could change ONE THING in this world, without regarding politics or bad guilt, what would it be?
A willingness in people to consider the effect they have on the environment and the drive to do something about it.
17. Do you like dancing?
yes!
18. George Bush?
WHY?
19. What do you want your children's names to be, girl/boy?
The names they were given by their parents.
20. Would you ever consider living abroad?
I already do.
21. What do you want God to tell you, when you come to heaven?
You're done.
22. Who should do this meme?
whomever wants to!
Sunday, October 22, 2006
fashion stylist
If I put in these keywords, will it get hit?
stylist
fashion
design
costa rica
what happens?
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Weeds
At first I was disappointed that it was a 1/2 hour show... and then I learned, that the shortness is a part of the magic. All that action, story, and character development in such a little bit of time. I think that a large part of the power is in the cast. Mary-Louise Parker! I have always loved her! Boys on the Side was POWERFUL! and she does the suburban housewife too... and Elizabeth Perkins? incredible!! The whole cast! even the kids. This is some MUST SEE TV ! I would say its worth the Showtime premium, but I think that watching an episode and having to wait a week for the followup would be like TORTURE!
Friday, October 13, 2006
Blog observations
Amalah -03/04
Dooce - 10/15/02
LeahPeah -11/20/02
and incase you are also a fan, I put the month and year I am up to too.
As you can see, I'm working my way through Amalah more quickly - and I guess its 'cause she's just so darn funny!
In her life, she has just started treatments to get preg-o, so she's childless and commuting.
The interesting part is seeing the commenting increase and to watch how things change.
The funny - strange funny - thing is that 2 of her commenters are other blogs I read.
Miss Zoot and Rude Cactus
I think I found Zoot through Amalah, so that's not so surprising, but Rude Cactus was like a big "huh!?"
See, I found him from Master b., who is actually someone I know!
(this is like a 7 degrees game - hee hee)
And here's something else - he's not an her blogroll!
Did something happen between them,
Is there SCANDAL in the Blogsphere??!
I guess I have to keep reading to find out!
Sunday, October 08, 2006
N = Ach; Yup, that's me!
I learned that according to McClelland
I am an "N-Ach (Need to Achieve)".
There are also "N-Aff (Need to Affiliate)" and "N-Ctl (Need to Control)".
The percentages fall out like this Ach = 15% Aff = 45% Ctl = 40%
So, basically, I'm in the minority. So it shouldn't surprise me that people are not like me. I should accept it. I should learn to work with the rest of the population, and have a little (ok a lot of) patience.