Thursday, February 22, 2007

"The story of the dishwasher"

I love Lowes
Once upon a time, there was a couple who's dishwasher broke. They went to Lowes and asked the salesperson: which is the quietest one, you see our kitchen and living room are all in one. They bought the recommended Bosche. The Lowes installer went to their house and they all noticed that the old dishwasher was stuck in on the top by a tile counter top and stuck in on the bottom by retro-installed real hard wood floors - ie 2 inches. Oh my, can you get that thing out? they asked the installer. No problem! he said, and after some pushing, pulling and really creative angles, out it came. He installed the new dishwasher and mounted it with an L-bracket to the counter.
Oh how they loved their new dishwasher. They couldn't tell when it was on it was that quiet. The dishes were all sparkly and clean.
A year later, they decided to remodel their kitchen. Now that was a whole saga of its own. But during the remodel, the lovely dishwasher waited in the garage to be reinstalled. Once it was back in its space, they came home to find that it hadn't been attached to the counter, so when they closed the door, the whole thing pushed back in the hole under the counter. Wazzup with that? they asked the contractor. What? you want it attached? But there's no bracket. Huh?! they replied, 'cause the Lowe's installer attached it to the counter. The contractor replied: There was no bracket, but I can make something up.
Now the couple had a new kitchen surrounding their lovely Bosche. They did a couple loads of dishes as they moved their stuff back into the kitchen, and the next day, noticed that the dishwasher was still draining. Huh? 12 hours later? that's not right? The contractor said it couldn't be how he installed it, and the customer service rep suggested that it may be a mechanical issue. So Mr. Appliance came to see. Look here! said the repair man. There are two holes on the inside tub! They look like they've been made by a screwdriver. Wha ?! And look here, inside the base, here is a screw and a bracket! Double Wha ?!
Of course the contractor denied any liability. But said he would work with the manufacturer to get a replacement. After a LONG drawn out back and forth with letters and serial numbers, ie THREE months. The manufacturer sends a replacement dishwasher. The couple decides that they will have a licensed Bosche installer do the work instead of the contractor and calls Mr. Appliance back. The first thing he does is take off the electrical cap to undo the wires. Guess what he finds? no, not some nice clean wires twisted together. He found a melted, burned, mess of wires! Oh my god! its a fire waiting to happen. The couple is furious!
Mr. Appliance obviously doesn't really know what he's doing. Pushing, pulling, he didn't know about the handy screw up front that allowed him to adjust the legs in the back, no he had to call his dispatcher to find out about that. He is flumuxed. He cannot get the dishwasher out of the space in the counter. This is strange to the couple because the hole is bigger than in the old kitchen's, the contractor got the dishwasher in the hole, how difficult can it be to get it out? Mr. Appliance gave up. He couldn't do it. Ok, say the couple, they didn't really want this man installing their dishwasher anyway.
I know, says the woman, I will call Lowes and have the same guy who did the original install come back. And that's what they did. Not only did Lowes figure out which company they had used previously, they also found the actual guy! Now that's customer service.
When the man came home from work that night, the couple decided to see if they could remove the dishwasher. They each took a side. Let's tip it up, the woman said. Snap! The dishwasher is out.
no, the dishwasher is not installed - yet. The old dishwasher is sitting outside of its hole, still connected to the sink drain, and the new dishwasher is sitting in the hallway ready for the installer. The couple are still waiting for the installer to call and schedule an appnt. Therefore.... be continued.

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