Sunday, April 05, 2009

Figuring it out...

Its funny what you learn about yourself if you open yourself up to it.
Over the past month, I have learned a lot of things about myself… there has been some purging, some weakness, some introspection, some assistance, and in the end, a lot of realizations.

Here is a question I’ve been thinking about:
What do I like to do?

Well, I have been just about work for the longest time, and when I think about things outside of that, the list is pretty short:

Now, if you are a friend that I’ve had over to a house, you might want to add cooking and baking to that list. Well, these are things I have done, but they are not my favorite things to do.
I am pretty crafty, but got to the point that I started to wonder what to do with the crap that I crafted, so I’m over that.

Let’s talk about the first two: Autocross is something that is usually done only once a month in a region. It can also get expensive because you have to keep your car serviced, maintained, and in good shape. I wonder if having the MINI club (DMC) in Arizona made the autocross easier and more fun. I plan to go out to the track this weekend here in CA, and see how things are run in this region.

I have done Flamenco most of my life. I started because it was far more interesting than ballet, and that’s what my mom had me busy doing as a child. The thing about Flamenco is that its an emotional expression in the form of dance. I have never felt that I had the right expression. I thought that maybe “one day” I would be older with lots of life experience and I would have something to express. I’ve started to realize, now that its “one day”, I’m older, and have had a lot of life experience, that I still don’t think I’m very good at expression. I’ve accepted that maybe its just not me.

So, if you minus the Flamenco, and the autocross is very infrequent, what do I like to do?

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